Porn Awareness Week



I just found out that it’s Porn Awareness Week. I had no idea such a thing even existed. So now I get to write about it.

Early this week, I read this article by Max Dubinsky.

A friend challenged me on it, disagreeing with what Max wrote. My friend believes that every human needs sex, and porn is just fulfilling that need.

I have friends who subscribe to Playboy.

I spent a year of my life researching human trafficking and fighting against it (I’m still fighting).

For several years, I’ve participated in leading an educational class for men who have been arrested for soliciting prostitutes.

I think, because of my educational focus and my professional experience, the topic of pornography is one I don’t bring up often. I’ve got this idea in my mind of why I think it’s unhealthy, destructive really, and why I’m against it. I never really feel the need to talk about it because I’ve read so much.

But we need to talk about it.  I need to talk about it.

Talking about pornography is just as much my responsibility as is talking about human trafficking, depression, world hunger, or boundaries (my all-time favorite topic).

I think porn serves as an immediate substitute for intimacy, but you can’t substitute anything for real intimacy. It’s often a driving cause behind broken marriages, depression, prostitution, and human trafficking. I’d love to give you statistics, but I’m being lazy right now. I promise, they’re out there.

Many people will say that porn isn’t a “big deal” or doesn’t really affect them. I disagree. Beyond believing that it does, in fact, affect a person and their relationships, porn is damaging to the people creating it. By participating in pornography, a person creates a demand for more.

I’m venturing to say that pornography is the leading cause behind human trafficking. 

Cameras can hide a lot of bruises. Who’s to say that the people you’re looking at haven’t been forced to be there?

Porn triggers addictive chemicals in the brain. Just like nicotine and cocaine. Over and over, I’ve heard that sex is the strongest drug available (and Playboy is like a “first snort”). We all want sex. We all need it. But how we go about it has the potential to create beauty or destruction in our lives.

By participating in pornography, you’re flirting with a dangerous addiction. Sure, maybe you aren’t addicted. If that’s the case, then stop.

Alcoholics aren’t addicted either, they just drink socially.

I get it, I really do. I don’t want you to read anything I’m writing from a voice of condemnation. This is written to educate. You won’t find condemnation here.

Once addicted to pornography, it becomes insufficient to satisfy sexual desires. The group, Sexaholics Anonymous, understands this. Those in the group (men and women) often talk of how their need for more sex becomes a controlling issue in their life.

Ok, so maybe you can look at porn every few months and not become addicted. Maybe you use porn as a way to have a healthy sexual relationship. I suppose it’s possible.

I know, however, that images stay with the mind for years, and can play through the mind, involuntarily, at any time.

And I’ve never met a woman who, if she’s truthful, is happy with her man needing a woman other than her, to engage in a healthy sex life.

I’ve never met a man who, if he’s truthful, is happy with his woman needing to look at another man to have a healthy sex life.

The last thing this world needs is to fuel a sex-driven culture.

If you use pornography, don’t stop using it out of guilt or shame. Don’t stop using it because you think it’s sinful. Stop using it because pornography is taking away the opportunity for you to engage in true, intimate relationships. Relationships full of honesty and vulnerability that don’t hold back.

Stop using pornography because, even if you’re the only one who knows about it, you’re hurting someone else.

You’re hurting your friends because they don’t have the chance at that intimate relationship with you.

You’re hurting the men and women in the porn industry. Why should you look at their naked bodies? Even if they chose to be in that photo or video, those are real people. People with names and families, who want to be known just as much as you do. Participating in their business keeps them in it. I don’t want that for them, and it breaks my heart that you do.


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